This is why I would never make it as Chief Marketing Officer for Nintendo.
Me: “Hey Nintendo, if you sign on with FIFA, and push the TVii service in Europe, you could see anywhere from 10 million to 100 million sales in Europe alone.”
Nintendo: “Yes, but what about the games?”
Me: “Well, with the added sales, it wouldn’t be too hard to get game developers and publishers back on board. Though, that wouldn’t really be the issue. The main problem right now is getting the system out there and into peoples homes. We can focus on games, and what gaming market to focus on, after we actually have the sale figures.”
Nintendo: “Sales… yes, yes; but the games are important. We’re not a sail company, we’re a game company. We hired you to market our platform as a game platform.”
Me: “Sure, but you can’t realistically compete against Sony and Microsoft right now. Developers are asking for more power, and the Wii U just can’t deliver that. That’s why if we focus on the sporting market, we can–“
Nintendo: “You’re fired.”
Me: “But, my strategy will get you tens if not hundreds of millions of unit sales, and billions of dollars in net revenue.”
Nintendo: “Here’s a Luigi plushy. Please understand.”
Me (under breath): “Gee thanks, Mario sucks anyway.”
—
Nintendo Board Room.
CEO: “So, how’s that fitness thing coming along?”
COO: “Oh, fantastic! Right now, you can move your left arm around, and it does stuff on screen!”
CEO: “Awesme! And how about the Amiibo’s?”
COO: “Well, we’re having a little trouble keeping up with demand, which is a good sign! It means people like them, and want more! We’re Nintendo, so they’ll just keep collecting them.”
CEO: “Good, good. Close down factory 1 and put all production on factory 2. Less toys, more demand.”
*golf claps throughout the board room*