Menu Close

If This Gets Onto Reddit, I’ll Eat A Turtle… not a real turtle, as that’d just be totally sick and probably unhealthy. Instead, I’ll eat me the best chocolate turtle treat I can find, and then paint my house (even though I don’t own a house) purple, just because I can, but mostly because it won’t be my house, but someone elses, as I kind of don’t own a house. Not allowed to paint the apartment, as that could get me evicted.. besides, what kind of color is “purple” anyways? I mean, it looks cool… IF YOUR EMO! (which I am)

My integrity as a blogger (or whatever it is I’m doing) is about to be thrown out of a giant nonexistent yet equally metaphorical window. The darkness has taken me for a twisted joyride, and I find myself unable to properly recover.

So, I regret to announce my imaginary resign from this nightmarish world. To unofficially put an end to this blog… at least for a couple of days.


Seriously though? Quite  a few of my readers (specifically: 1) have been sending me some rather annoying emails. Every single person here  (one person)  is annoying the living hell out of me, asking me to do this, and post that.

So, I’ve finally decided to give in. Roughly one month after my last poorly formatted and underappreciated entry, I give you all….  If This Gets Onto Reddit, I’ll Eat A…… well, just read the super long title above. I’m too damn lazy to retype that shit, and copy and pasting is too damn easy. Gotta work for my internet fame, but not hard enough to actually use more than one button at a time, or to even use the mouse. So, just reread the title, and pretend I retyped the entire thing down here.



And there you have it, more insanity from Ty.



(disclaimer: Ty is not responsible for any medical bills this article male two and such)